EYES ON THE PRIZE

As an ADD kid, all I have been craving for is FOCUS, and yet I havent felt i could get a purchase on it. everything was too fascinating, everything also felt like too much pressure amnd respomnsibility, i had to be everything to everyone and everything ust like with mom and dad

but I am finding the healing and it’s trickling down to everything

I got the message on that equinox journey in 2023 - after breaking convention and before nest - it’s about briding the realms of academia and science and spirituality and art and esoteric fuckin shit. i got the message then but I didn’t trust it but it keeps coming back again and again.

IN MY JOURNEY OF NOMADING AND CONSCIOUSNESS EXPLORING - NOMADING TRANSDIMENSIONALLY - I HAVE LEARNED TO FOLLOW THE FEELING, WHEN THE VOICE SAYS SOMETHING ND I KNOW I CAN TRUST IT WHICH IS SO RARE

it told me to BE A STUDENT OF MUSHROOMS AND CACAO

AND APPRENTICE W ASH AND ACACEA

and two years later here I am again

they are my guides but the plants and fungi are my teachers

and I am not rooted yet becase i need to be free to go where the voice takes me

and i am going into the night world because it’s the key to everything

the plants that flourish under cover of darkness like DMT

cacao that blossoms in the night and amanita the fungi of death and transformation

these are my teachers, sacraments, muses and medicines

so i am being called to the night world of berlin and I am submitting papers and presentations for breaking convention

taking classes from ash and acacea and workshops on theatre devising

the art is also costume and set design and nature documentation

let it SUPPORT what you’re doing not distract from it

I want to talk about music because it has been so important to me but it’s also an attachment to stephen and joe and I can’t do everything

i need to let that go for now i think

and focus on amanita and cacao and performance and transness - the music supports it but let others tell it

I FEEL SO FUCKING MATURE MAKING DECISIONS